tea_and_ink: (bookish)
[personal profile] tea_and_ink
-But the important one is:

Dear Flist:

I love y'all to death, but please to be stopping with the so-darn-active behavior when I'm not around to condone your spamming tendencies. Thank you.

Lotsa love, me.

-Moving on. We had to do this sex-ed thing in that high school I used to counsel for, and oh my god! the things a gilr's gotta listen to get her license to actually listen. There was this one girl who approached me personally after the main event (a lecture on safe sex, the advantages and procedures of, and then some Q&A session that featured the little genius who was yet to figure out how very not-pregnant anal sex can get you) and asked me about the common, early symptoms of pregnancy,  to then sigh in relief when I failed to include dry hands into the enumeration.

There was a lot of restrain on my part -and I really feel like I deserve a medal or something- in order to quash the impulse/need of repeatedly hitting my head against the desk right there because of forms and also, the girl really didn't know, and this is where my beef is, she was having sex (actively, as this one would appear to be at least the second freak out about a possible pregnancy) and not know what to look for in case there's something to be looked for, not to mention to allow that case in the first place! (clearly I did make a point out of individual hormone cycles and body chemistry, it was possible that in her, dry hands could mean a significant change in her body balance, but since I have very basic knowledge on that area it wouldn't be wise to just stay with my opinion and go to a doctor, then she specified it had been five months since her last period. That is just out of my hands, sent her to a doctor anyway, because it is a reason to be worry)

It's sex people, it is a serious issue and it is a big deal. Why is that so hard to understand? With sex comes a number of responsibilities that just cannot be overlooked in favor of praying and dancing under the moon, because that's just way less blush-inducing than going to a local library and borrow that little book with pictures in it. I mean, information is right there, all you gotta do is get over yourself and just go get it.

A guy came over after that and asked me if being a christian (I wear a crucifix around my neck) I considered sex a sin/crime. I asked him if he had a regular partner, if said partner was somebody else's official partner, if there had been raping involved, being these cases, imo, the ones that would step into sin/crime scenery (also the ones I could come up with at the moment to illustrate the point). Other possibilities involved ill intentions towards his partner and/or a possible third party, fear and insecurity in his relationship with his partner, insecurities about his own sexuality and some other potential situations that would have more to do with personal conceptions and, maybe, morality, than with the more general rules of religion and/or laws. Needless to say, after this I was pulled out from the table by the head professor to be lectured on the proper ways of answering that kind of dangerous questions. In his opinion, such questions should be answered in home, but then again, if there were answers back home, why would sex-ed be necessary in the first place? If there were answers back home, why would these questions be posed at all? So, in conclusion, the educational system kicks the ball into the family court, and the family neatly dodges it dumping the responsibility back on the school.

At the end of the day, it's the kids' fault that the hospital needs a especial wing to treat the ever-increasing amount of pregnancies and STD cases in teens (with an age range of thirteen to twenty-one years old)

I came home to sulk. Oh, the state of this world!

Date: 2007-09-15 08:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sonam-bitts.livejournal.com
I agree with you. Especially about the family-school court thing. In India, very much so. Here, family members are very hesitant to talk about it. Very. It's all awkward and weird. And usually avoided. And schools try their best but they are seemingly so bad at it.

For example, my sister has just entered college. (We finish schooling at 15 and then two years, a junior college before we can pursue our degree.) Anyway she turns 16 and the end of this month, and I don't know we were watching something or she was reading some book which had smut. Yeah, the book. Now she probably shouldn't be reading it till eighteen but she's a smart kid and she was already halfway through the book. Asking her to stop at this point was not an option. So I thought why not a little, umm, talk. And I asked her if she knew all about it. She said, sorta, but when I ask her to tell me what she knows, it was next to nothing. And when I went on to explain, man, was she shocked and disgusted. Especially when I came to the oral & anal parts of it.

It was embarassing as hell for us both, because well, I can talk about it to my other sister who's just a couple years younger, but this one's half a decade younger and we're just not that close. But I feel better about it knowing that she won't come to know from other weird sources and be even more weirded out.

So yeah, I think that people especially the elders need to be more open about sex, gawd, how many problems would be solved if they just did. HIV is one for sure. You can't blame your kid for being careless when you were not even bothered to sit him/her down because it's an awkward topic. We read about rape, underage sex, teen pregnancy, HIV, STD and a hundred other cases everyday. Can't we just learn that it's better to get it over with today than deal with the consequences for lifetime?

Date: 2007-09-16 06:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zelost-mind.livejournal.com
Oh man. Just... Oh, man.

With sex comes a number of responsibilities. Heh, just like with superpowers -- With great sex comes great responsibility!

Hey, you know you can't get pregnant if you're on top? And you can't get pregnant if you do it on your period. Oh! And you can't get pregnant if you do it in the shower, either.

And did you know you can only contract HIV from having sex with a gay guy?

Oh! And if a guy takes a hand full of your contraceptive pills, he can't get you pregnant.

Yeah... I learned all this in college. COLLEGE! *shoots self*

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